Laughing is good

Another book review! Finally!

I'm a huge fan of Sophie Kinsella. I can say I own every book with that name as the author. And I have read each one a few times. I like the way she rights. It flows nicely and keeps you entertained like you are listening to some inner monologue that just keeps getting more ridiculous.

Her latest book, Remember Me, is about a woman who looses the last three years of her life. She crashes her flashy car and BAM! The last three years are earased and she goes back to the days when she wore cheap clothes and had girlfriends who went clubbing. However, that is not who she is at all at the current point in time. She is uber bitch boss. The journey the main character takes is intresting and funny. The subject matter is not heavy, but it is a good escape from reality.

I read this book right after I had finished my first (and only so far) read through of Breaking Dawn. The two books are VERY different. One: the main characters. Bella annoys me to no end and I have no reason to like her. Lexi (main character in Remember Me) is likeable right away. She is just like you or me. She has redeemable qualities. You can RELATE TO HER! I do not know about you, but I enjoy reading books that I can RELATE to the main character, or at least understand why they are how they are. Kinsella is pretty darn good at creating characters people can relate to (even by the title of her books, my mom shouted once "When will this woman stop writing books about you?") It has been awhile since I had read a Kinsella book, but after reading Remember Me I remembered why I enjoyed her books so much: they are amusing.

On a side note, I wrote a short story a long while back titled Remember Me! It has no relation to the book at all, as the character has not lost her memory and must remember herself. She is hoping rather hoplessly that someone will remember she exists and will call her while listening to Eminem scream loudly REMEMBER ME! I currently do not remember which song that Eminem screams that a few times over and over, but he did. He seemed to really want us to remember him (like anyone could forget...), just like the character telling her story wanted to be remembered. She was not remembered and remained where she was curled up in bed.

I am very happy that the book Remember Me did not end that way as if it had, it would not have been a very good book

The Mindset List

At the start of every school year, these two guys at Beloit College put out this list that they call the Mindset List. They put this out every year, as you can hear about in that nice conference they give under that link. I had no idea what the Mindset List was until the year before I went off to college. That year, my dad shoved under my nose the Chicago Trib and said "READ THIS!" in his excited manner he gets when he is REALLY EXCITED about something. I read it and felt sort of silly, as half the things on that list I had no clue what they meant.

But that is the point of the mindset list. It is the mindset of the incoming freshman class of that year.

When I got the email about this years mindset list and read it, it made me feel old. I shouldn't feel that old, as I not that old, but it did make me feel a little dated.

However, that is truely not the point of this post. The point of this post is Tom McBride, one of the guys who put together the list. I went to Beloit for four years and had Tom McBride as a professor. Beloit is the type of school where you call the professors all by their first names. You have Georgia, Warren, Nancy, Bob, Tod, Emily, Sophie and on and on. However, Tom McBride was almost referred to as Tom McBride when you were not speaking to him. For awhile, I referred to him as Tommcbride. All one word as that was how I said it. I do not really understand why we always called him Tom McBride, but he was a full name professor. The only other professor that seeminly broke the first name rule was Krider, but that was only because he was Krider. You would never call him Emiel to his face. It just felt...wrong.

Anyways, so this Mindset List came out and I found myself face to face with Tom McBride again. Tom McBride is the flagship professor for Beloit. I am not sure how he managed to become the flagship professor of Beloit, but he is. Talking just like he has always talked, saying pretty much the same thing he always says.

let the rain fall down...

It is raining in the dirt hole. Truly, utterly raining. The street turned to a rapid flowing river, the back yard into a lake, and the sidewalk a quickly flowing creek. The roof turned into a waterfall and the driveway into a downhill stream.

Worst of all, I think the poor plants have drown. Tragic. I kinda liked the plants.

Now, I love rain. I love all sorts of rain. Okay, I'll be honest, I adore bad weather (as long as I do not have to go out in it too much). I think my love affair with bad weather started in Scotland, where it rains like every single day. All sorts of rain. Rain that comes up, rain from the side, rain that seems to just hang in the air, dry rain, wet rain, super wet rain, rain that drizzles, rain that spatters and so much more. Almost no day was the same when it came to rain. After I returned to the USA, I missed the constant bad weather, I felt a need for rain. I needed rain storms, I needed thunder storms, I needed massive amounts of water to fall on my head that came out of a cloud not a shower head. It was a strange need, but I needed it.

Rainy days in college meant puddle jumping. Rainy days meant a lot of muddle people, wet curly hair and umbrellas. Rainy days also meant that I could sit by my huge window with a hot cuppa tea and stare at these muddy people. Tea makes you feel warm and fuzzy when you curl up next to a big window and watch it rain and storm. Tea is the element needed in order to really enjoy rain storms.

Today, I have only had one cuppa tea. I had it this morning with breakfast. I have only had one cuppa tea for a few reasons. 1) we're out of good British tea and 2) we're out of milk and 3) here in dirt land, one is hard pressed to find a jar of set honey (known in the US of A as whipped honey). Tragically, since arriving back in these lands, I have not had a real cuppa tea, just subs for the real thing. Living with the Lipton tea in the house now, I have not felt the need to have one...also, I have been paranoid all day the house will flood and I will be more miserable then my cold addled mind can handle.

Now, why am I paranoid the house will flood? By my standards it has not rained all that much today. However, by dirt hole standards we just had the rain of all rains. There are no major drains here, no place for all this water to run, so it just sort of flows all over, builds its lakes and streams everywhere. I used to live in a ditch. The ditch had better drainage than living on this "hill" I currently reside on. However, after seven hours of water falling out of the sky, the flow of water down the street has stopped and the lake in the backyard is slowly going elsewhere. Who knows, tomorrow the water might all evaporate into the nether world and leave me forever.

In all honesty, I worst fear is to live somewhere that gets no rain storms. I know its strange, but I feel like every now and then I need them. It is like that garbage song, "I'm Only Happy When It Rains." Its odd, but its true. I like rain, I like cold weather. I miss sweaters, I miss rain coats, I miss fuzzy hats.

At least it rained a lot today. I might not get to wear that fuzzy sweater here, but at least I know it does sometimes rain.

This sounded better in my head

I have never had the joy of having a social calender before in my life, not that I actually have one right now at this very moment. I do have a calender that has nothing written on it, but I do not write my social engagements on it due to the fact I usually discover I have social engagements about five seconds before I need to report to them. This is how the world operates, on the spur of the moment.

That is not what this is about, this is about social things in general. I have never been a super social being. I hate parties, I hate large gatherings in general. There is a pressure there to dress up, look pretty and make small talk. I can't do small talk, as this head I use does not process information quick enough to be good at small talk. I like small social gatherings when you are trying to get to know the people around you. Small talk is pointless in reality for me. I have no interest in it. I like small groups, they have a purpose for me.

This past few weekends I have been a little social butterfly, almost never home long enough to touch down and take time to breathe. I flit between houses, lakes, boats and restaurants. Game nights, beer nights, wine nights, you name it I've been to one within a very short time span. The months before we moved to the dirt hole, my husband and I hardly EVER did anything remotely social. I would pester him sometimes, thus why he decided to introduce me to A&R and they became our social partners in crime for a few short months. I never thought in a million years I would be removed from an urban environment and suddenly have social situations everywhere. I cannot claim I have a "best friend" here. I have noticed there is always a pair of girls/women that seem to know one another better than the others in the group. Their husbands are best buds, knew one another from casual duty, a silly class they went to, field training, officer training, flying little planes for no reason other than to get rid of a few people. Their wives seem to latch on to one another and suddenly have a "close" sort of relationship with one another. These pairs seem to hang out together, sit around houses together and do things together other than go to social events. This fascinates me, as I wonder how this happens. For a while I hoped this would happen to me, but then I realized I operate too well on my own. A friend of mine seems to be the same way, only craving social interactions with other girls occasionally. I do more with her than any one else I've met here. I guess it also helps that she is the R of A&R thus I have gone through that awkward first meeting and me bumbling over words and phrases. Her pace of life is more akin to mine in a sense. I almost desperately for awhile wanted to like the other people I've met here, but the pressure I felt to be "one of them" was a little too much for me. I realized I am happy simply being who I am, as awkward as I am.

Oh, the night I decided I was going to be just my awkward, Stargate loving, Harry Potter obsessed, Star Trek nerd that I am something happened: I became at ease. I was sitting at the table, a lovely table that I had been horridly jealous of, and I stared at D (one of my husbands classmates) and just said, "I am horridly awkward. So I think I'll just be my old awkward self." He looked at me like I had lost my mind for a moment, not sure how this had happened, but he nodded and asked me what TV shows I watched. My husband gets a great joy out of telling people he married a sci-fi geek for some reason. I don't know how he could have missed this, as he only seemed to realize I liked the Sci-Fi channel a lot these last few months, but he seems to have great joy that I am a nerd in that sense.

Since I decided I was just going to be awkward and myself, the social gatherings have become less stressful to me. These people I meet in the dirt hole will go away at some point. I am not stuck with them for four years, nor am I 16 and worried about if they will like me if I have clothes from Abercrombie.

As I stated before, I have never been one to have a lot of social events in one weekend. All through high school I always had something to do, someone to talk to, people to juggle. In college I made it simple and kept to a core group of friends. There were weekends I would lay on the floor of my dorm and stare at the ceiling because I had nothing to do. I spent my summers doing just that wondering what I had done the past four years to prevent the staring at the wall syndrome. After college I had a lot of time to myself, as most of my friends were from far away places that were not near my urban center, however, my weekends were filled with my car and myself driving to see my husband. So, basically, for the past six years I became used to not being social with masses of people. It took awhile, but I got the hang of it it seems.

Say it ain't so?!

OMG.
I am so upset.

Okay, not really. I was just sitting here thinking that come November, I'd get another Harry Potter movie to enjoy. I could pay 2.50! Oh, the excitment!

Nope.

Stupid Warner Brothers is being evil. It won't come out till July 2009!!!!!!!!!!! WHY!? Do they not realize that I will be UBER busy trying to come to terms in an unknown location?! In November I would be happily doing NOTHING. I would have time to see Harry Potter in the theater, and I would not be watching James Bond. I do not like James Bond films unless they are TV with a thousand and one commercials in them so I can get something to eat and watch something else while also watching James Bond. Wait, there is not much cross between Harry Potter fans and James Bond fans. Oh, I thought so.

I will blame the Dark Knight, as the silly studio seems to be under the impression that in the summer is when people go see movies. Now, yes, so far this summer I have seen a record THREE movies. However, this is not because they were released in the summer. No, this is because I happen to come across THREE movies that I thought were worth seeing. If this happened in November, I would have gone to see THREE movies. So instead of going to see it in November at Thanksgiving time, I have to wait until JULY 2009. Oh, the blood is boiling as the people who make BILLIONS just to squeeze BILLIONS more out of the Harry Potter franchise.

Well, I might have to fill the void of no Harry Potter with Twilight now. Just to have something to do.

dreams, we all have draems

This morning, after my husband rolled out of bed at 5.30 am, I fell asleep and had a dream where I was making an white eyelet dress lined with light yellow and I was packing to leave a house that was to be oxidized. My husband failed to pack any of his clothes and I yelled at him. He did not seem to care that his clothes were to be oxidized with the house, but a bunch of people I knew from high school and college cared. I then got stuck in the trap door in the bed and had to be helped out by James Earl Jones and this old lady I used to work with.

I tell this story to illustrate how my mind works. I believe dreams your head bothers to remember are important for some reason, even if it seems there is no meaning behind it. My husband would not fully pack items before a move (I know this from experience) but I have no idea why a house must be oxidized, nor do I understand why James Earl Jones was in my dream. Other than he sort of went with the old house me, my husband, and all these random people were living in.

The dress is the real thing that sticks with me because I want a dress like that. I have a pattern, I just don't know to make a lined dress, let alone a dress. I am willing to try. Sewing is one of the skill I plan to hone in the dirt hole here. This is hindered though because there are no fabric stores save Walmart in the dirt hole. This is horridly tragic for a multitude of reasons. I am contemplating ordering some clothe off the internet, but am at a loss for what website to use. I think I might go to Walmart and see if they have any eyelet fabric and thin light yellow cotton. Who know? Walmart might surprise me?

The other day I saw Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 at the movie theater here for 2.50. I fell in love with Lena's clothes in that movie, sort of like I fell in love with the actress that plays her in Gilmore Girls. For almost two years I've aspired to have that girls hair cut. I finally gave up about five months ago. Just tossed the towel in and chopped it off. I now and contemplating trying to sew certain pieces similar to what Lena had in the movie. This might require a trip to a bigger civilization (or civilization in general) to get cloth, but I think I have the time to do this project.

The movie itself was good as well. I am not a HUGE fan of movies based on books that I like for a wide array of reasons. I think I screamed at the first three Harry Potter movies and I wasn't too thrilled with the first Sisterhood movie, as I thought the actress (even though I like her) for Lena was all wrong. Alexis Bledel does not look Greek, I am sorry. Though, I guess that is the point of Lena, she doesn't look Greek. I digress though, this movie I actually liked, even with all the analysis I was doing throughout the movie. It was actually a nice way of pulling the last three books into one movie. Some of the things done in the movie were pretty darn funny, though my favorite part was when Tibby fell off the donkey and then walked into the courtyard and announced "I just fell off a donkey (looks at the three other girls who stare at her) Are we having fun yet?" It was well worth the 2.50 I paid to see it.

During the previews, I finally saw the Twilight preview. Least to say, I'm not overly excited for it, but then you know my feelings about those books. I might be willing to put down 2.50 to see the movie, but I was not impressed with what I saw in the least. Maybe it will be a totally awesome stand alone movie? The tragic thing about the series is that is has potential. The story line has it, the characters have it...it just all falls down and goes boom in teen angst and a lead character that has very few redeeming qualities. I wanted to snicker through out the whole preview, but I had no one to snicker to who knew the depths of my snickers towards the books. The series has those fans that are rabid about it, and then fans who just enjoy it and you have to be careful of the rabid fans.

I think I know what truly bothered me about the Twilight preview: Edward. He doesn't look right. That actor from the Harry Potter movie looks right to be Cedric, but not Edward. He's missing something...Bella looks right (even though I have always picture as a blond, but blame Days of Our Lives for that one...) Anyways, I guess it would be hard to find a guy who was gorgeous, perfect, beautiful, had bronze hair and was as pale as one could possibly be. I think that guy only exists in the world of fiction and dreams.

oh, but to wait a little longer

Surfing. I enjoy surfing. As long as it is surfing the web. I spend a great deal of time (much more than I ought to) surfing around the web. I think I inherited this skill and time consuming hobby from my father who has surfed around the web since it began. He was at the forefront of web surfing, maybe one of the first to spend a great deal of time surfing away. He has always been web savy, always understood how it works, and always wondered at how its changed.

I tend to surf for the same type of things on a daily basis. I have my Google New page set up to aid in this mindless surfing for news stories. Yesterday, I was rewarded with all the responses to Mrs. Black's wailing about being betrayed by friends. The FT (Financial Times) seemed to agree with me. Or at least how I thought I had written my rant on her story. I think my favorite part when when he seeming spoke to Mrs. Black, saying on her snip about the appeal hearing that did nothing for proclaiming that Conrad is innocent:

Lady Black, it was an appeal court. Of course Judge Posner kept on interrupting to discover points of law when faced by a defense attorney rhetorically claiming that Lord Black had been a victim of a miscarriage of justice.

If you don’t that know this is how US appeal court and Supreme Court judges behave in order to get to the point, you don’t get out much.

Oh, how I laughed at that. It is so true. Plus, I always enjoy tongue in cheek writing like that. Another point the author makes here is how she's moaning that all their high power friends left their sides in their hour of need. Sure....you asked for it. As, John Gapper puts it:

She appears to be particularly hurt that their friends (and Hollinger directors) such as Henry Kissinger and Marie-Josée Kravis did not stick by them when things got ugly.

Well, if you choose your friends according to how important they are and treat people of lesser wealth or social status with contempt, as the Blacks were notorious for doing, then you should not be surprised when your “friends” do not stick with you through thick and thin.

This is true. During the trial, a "birthday party" for Mrs. Black was put on the block. It was mostly paid by Hollinger, but was billed as a "surprise birthday party." The defense went on to ramble about how this wasn't a personal party because none of their friends were invited. Oh? Really? As time wore on and talk of the birthday party worn on, I realized something: The Black have no personal friends. Every single thing they do, event they attend, event they throw is a NETWORKING FAIR. That is the whole purpose of their lives: networking, something I loathe from every fiber of my being. I understand its point, but in our world today where it is how you get anywhere, you hardly ever get anywhere on merit. One of the witnesses for the trial was a former editor...I do not remember his name, but he wrote a bunch of books or something later and got these nice jobs because...because he knew Conrad Black. He tried time and time again to tell us he did it all by himself, but that is just a lie he tells himself. He is where he is because Conrad told him to be there (like on the witness stand).

Another article worthy of mention is the Guardian blog, Greenslade. The article, titled Ameil plays Cleopatra in casting Conrad Black as Dreyfus. When I read the orginal bit of "fiction" by Mrs. Black (also known as Mrs. Ameil Black, or just Ameil sometimes...woman has too many names), I had some of the same thoughts. However, never seeing American Gigalo, the movie she referenced, I had no clue what she was talking about. However, the reference to Cleoplatra he makes, I do understand. Ameil Black is the queen of denial. The author Roy Greenslade closing paragraph really hit home:

He [Conrad] and Radler - who, at least had the grace to admit it - rooked investors while deceiving fellow directors and shareholders for their own personal gain. That is the beginning and end of it. Her attempt to portray Black as a naive innocent deserving of our sympathy because businessmen can't get a fair trial in the United States is risible.

If businessmen did no wrong, they get a fair trail. Isn't that how the system works? Did I miss something? Oh, wait, no I did not. I was there, I know I missed nothing that would proclaim the reality Amiel Black toots is reality. I missed the bigger picture, the bigger scheme that truly went on due to the system of objections and "that's not important!" However, as one ages and learns, there is always a bigger picture behind what is on trial. You hardly ever get the whole truth and nothing but the truth. You do get facts and lots of facts. You get lots of paper and more paper. And you get the picture that something sketchy went on and end of story.

a rant, a review? what it is, I am not sure

If you have never bothered to read the Twilight series and want to either catch up or just get another view point of it, try this site. I read the books and found this HIGHLY amusing. I only read the Breaking Dawn summery and I do not think I ever laughed so much by reading something. It does aid to have read the books, but its still funny if you have not. Anyways, I will digress into my own review of the whole thing.

I was really excited when I got the first book, Twilight. I had read various things on the book and read the author's website, www.stephaniemeyer.com and I liked what I saw. The preview chapters were great and made me go out and buy three books within one week. I read the first three books all within two days of getting them, plowed through them in a week before I came to the dirt hole. Anyways, it was not until I got to the third book, Eclipse that I got to be annoyed. By the end of Breaking Dawn I was plum tired.

For one, Bella annoys me to no end. She does not seem to have any purpose in life other than to obsess about Edward. Edward, meanwhile, had nothing better to do than to be an overbearing, overprotective boyfriend who did odd things. However, because neither of them was truly interested in life without the other one glued to his or her side, the books lost a lot of the magic they gained through a first reading. Bella whined, Edward was just too perfect for words and had now flaws, and poor Jacob was a brat. I am a Jacob fan. I fell in love with the guy in New Moon. I felt sorry for him in New Moon as Bella was just simply evil throughout the book. And what made it worst was the fact she knew she was evil. In Breaking Dawn Jacob rocked, till he imprinted and lost his angst.

What drew me into Twilight in the first place was the relationship between the vampire and the human. How would this end up well? Well, the majority of the book is this: First Edward seemingly has a huge issue with Bella and refuses to speak to her, let a lone look at her, then one day POOF he starts talking to her again. Then he goes on to ask a BILLION questions and take her to a meadow and POOF they are madly in love with one another. Then, just when everything seems okay, POOF bad guy show up and start hunting Bella. BAM! Let's go one the run and BAM Bella almost dies, but guess who saves the helpless idiot? Edward. The end.

When you read a book at lightening speed and get swept up into it, then it was AWESOME! This is why I went out the next day and bought New Moon. However, if you read it ever so slowly and all ready know it, you pick up on all the things that are annoying. Like, there is no falling in love it JUST HAPPENS. POOF. BAM!

In New Moon Edward has the bright idea he should LEAVE BELLA. I know, bright idea when you are addicted to one another. In the first book, Edward told Bella that she was his brand of herion. So, one would think that he wouldn't so willingly give up a fix like that. And if he did, he would, well if he could, die. But nonetheless, he left. And Bella, who was always convinced he would grow bored with her because she wasn't as beautiful as him, etc, figured this was why he left and just let him leave. And then she did that whole wallowing thing for MONTHS. It was almost like the fifth Harry Potter book all over again with angst teenage Harry, but this was worst because it was addict Bella going through withdrawal that never ENDED. On and on it went, and then she heard his voice in her head when she did something stupid! OH MY GOD! I'm crazy, but this is sooo good, let's do something stupid loads of times just to hear his voice. She gets the bright idea to buy motorcycles and has Jacob fix them up, as in the first book she learned he was good with fixing cars and the such. She bankrolls the project and discovers that Jacob makes her feel half human again. He is her sunshine, her only sunshine. And thus, the easily addicted Bella becomes a Jacob addict. Lovely, right?

Nope. Because Bella is a wee bit more addicted to that voice in her head. So, what does she do? Well, she leaps off a cliff, but I'll get to that. Shortly before her cliff diving experience, she finds out Jacob is...a werewolf! Yeah, she just can't find anyone normal (not that it would be hard. Everyone is in love with Bella. I forgot to mention that in the first book, they all love her when she first arrives in the tiny town of Forks, WA. They fight over her, constantly ask her out on dates and she turns them all down). So, Jacob is a werewolf and there is...guess what? A vampire after Bella. Again! Evidently, in killing the vampire that almost killed Bella before, pissed this other vampire off. So, this vampire decided to come back and hunt Bella, which caused more werewolf's to pop up! So, there are all these werewolves running around and after a stupid hike into the forest to find the meadow there BAM she fell in love, Bella has a near death experience. Nothing new to her, but all the same she finds out the vampire is after her. After finally putting all the pieces together, she tells her werewolf friend about this, and she spends a lot of time around his place being "protected." However, she likes the voice more than Jacob, so she leaps off a cliff and almost dies. In various ways, as the vampire who is after her is swimming around and she almost drowns.

Side note: Edward has a family. They are not related, but most were created by the "father" Carlise. Carlise created Edward, Esme, Rosalie, and Emmett. Rosalie and Emmett are mates, and Carlise and Esme are mates. Jasper and Alice joined the family on their own. So, this family is special in some ways as they do not eat people for one and two, three of them have gifts. Edward can hear people's thoughts, Alice can see the future, and Jasper can, uh, play with people's emotions. Like calm you down if you get too worked up (he does this to Bella A LOT.) I forgot to mention this in the first place. The future Alice sees also changes depending on decisions made by others. She also cannot see beings she has not experienced being. Basically she can only see humans and vampires. All right, back to what I was babbling about before.

Well, due to the fact Bella made the decision to JUMP off a CLIFF, Alice sees Bella dying. She does not see Bella rescued because she's saved by Jacob, the werewolf. Anyways, so things go to almost back to normal and Bella begins to think she might be able to start something more with Jacob, but just as she's getting to that point, guess who shows up?

Did you guess Edward? You are wrong. If you guessed Alice then you are right. Jacob freaks out and Bella tosses herself at Alice. Bella is OVER JOYED to the point that its sad that Alice is there. Jacob is rather grumpy that Alice is back. During one of the many, many fights between Bella and Jacob the phone rings. And guess what? Guess who called?

If you guess Edward this time, then you are right. Edward heard from Rosalie (whose super power is just overly beautiful and bitchy because she never got to have a baby and an ever loving loving husband) that Bella was dead. However, this is wrong information, but he calls Bella's house pretending to be Carlise and asks for Bella's father. However, Bella's father is at a funeral (for his friend Harry who died of a heart attack the same day Bella tried cliff diving) and Jacob tells this to the caller, leaving out whose funeral it was. The caller takes this as Bella is dead. And he decides to die as well. However, how does a vampire die?

Not too easily. Vampires can't really kill themselves too well. The whole stake thing doesn't work, or sunshine busting. One must be set on fire after being broken up into little bits to die. So, Edward has to have some help. So he goes to see the Royal Vampire Family in Italy! Yeah, the vamps have a royal family. They are not as cool as the British ones, but eh. How much can you ask for?

Anyways, Alice sees this and she and Bella run to save Edward from himself. Along the way, the human Bella must turn into a vampire at some point because she just knows too much about vamps to be good for her fragile, accident prone self.

Edward and Bella re-addict to one another, leaving only on issue: Bella's also an Jacob addict. Uh no! But let's not think too much about that now, we'll figure that out later.

The next book Eclipse is pretty bad when you read it even really fast. I spent most of it hating Bella because she's a whiny, self absorbed, Edward addicted, no talent drama queen. Yeah. She is. She hates causing anyone pain, but that is all she does. She attempts to be friends with Jacob, but Edward doesn't want her hanging out with baby werewolves because they are DANGEROUS. Yeah, and the vampires are good for her. Sure. (Well, to his credit, Edward would much rather Bella not hang out with the vamps, but Bella has no self preservation, so she hangs out with dangerous things.) Most of the book is a slow progression towards the attack of Victoria, who was the vamp stalking Bella in New Moon. There are some interesting bits, like when we find out more about vampire culture and newborns. Vampires have wars. And if they get too out of hand, the Royal Family of the Vampires shows up to clean house, keeping order and protecting the vampires from their food sources knowledge. A lot of the book seems to deal with Bella's preparation and desperation to be a vampire. Bella fears aging, like any 18 year old would fear it. However, instead of using plastic surgery later in life, Bella decides it would be wise to be a strong, cold hard vampire. She has no interest in human things at all. Even after Rosalie talks to her about having babies and stuff, Bella still wants to toss it all away to be a vamp. Okay, fine. To each her own. Just stop whining about it and make up your mind.

What really bugged me about New Moon was how she pulled Jacobs strings. Also, how much Jacob was a total jerk at times, yet he really did have a right to be a total jerk, as Bella was simply being evil. She seemed to think she had to have everything she was addicted to, even when two of those addictions hated one another.

However, in the end she agrees to marry Edward (which she did not want to because she was too young to get married. Uh, you're too young to get married but not too young to decide you want to toss away your human life for a vampire life? being married is a different level of commitment than being a vampire...at least if you're married you can get a divorce. You are stuck a vampire for ever more...I did not understand her aversion to marriage at all when she wanted to be vampire. She was mostly worried what other people thought. OH, now worry about what other people thing, I see...) and agrees to hold off on the becoming a vamp until Edward has sex with her while she's human. Edward will only have sex if she is married, so okay, let's let Alice through an over the top wedding!

Jacob gets pissed and runs away.

Breaking Dawn starts off with Bella driving around in a tank of a car and trying to appease her father with this stupid wedding coming up. One can clearly tell Bella isn't into the whole getting married thing. She seems to be doing it for everyone else, not herself. But she knows she will have sex with Edward in the end as a human and get that human experience, which is the only one she wants.

So, la la la, complain complain, get married. Lovely wedding, everything is perfect, no one cares she is fresh out of high school and married. La la la la! Whoo hooO! Oh, wait, Jacob comes home and almost explodes into a furry being when he hears Bella is going to have sex with the super rock hard, super strong vampire she just married.

And did he think she wouldn't? Oh, wait, he thought she'd wait till she was a vamp? NO way dude.

The whole sex thing never bothered me. I don't really like reading about teenagers having sex, I don't mind hearing the run up to, but whatever afterwards. However, in the book, they do have sex. It is rough sex, bruises, broken pillows and feathers. However, while Edward would rather not ever do that again, Bella becomes a sex fiend. And so she will stay.

So, on the honeymoon, they have sex a total of two times I believe. And guess what? Bella's pregnant! And the baby is growing really fast! DEMON BABY! I think I laughed when I read that. I was like, only Bella would get pregnant right off the bat.

Anyways, so they go home and la la la, now its, wait, Jacob's turn to tell the story? Jacob, if I can say so, is a way better story teller and narrator than Bella. I like him. I like him more after reading his chapters. He is not over dramatic in the least. He rocks hard core.

Jacobs chapters tell his side of the story, which picks up around the time Bella returns and he finds her REALLY FREAKING PREGGERS. He tells his pack and they freak out and want to murder everyone in the house with Bella. Jacob will not hear of this, goes a bit freaking and somehow manages to break off from the pack. His little buddy Seth follows (as Seth is best friends with Edward now after the huge fight against Victoria in the last book...) and they start their own pack and later are joined by Leah, Seth's sister who is a bitter little lady. The only female wolf ever. Anyways, the three decide to protect the house withe Bella in it. Then, after one hell of a blood birth scene, the baby is born and BAM, Jacob is in love with it due to this freaky thing that werewolves do called imprinting. The baby demon is his soul mate. His soul mate is named Renesmee. Yeah, you see that right. Jacob prefers to call her Nessie. Most people call her this, except Bella who TOTALLY FREAKS OUT, but in the end still calls the kid Nessie by the end.

So, due to this horrific birth, Bella almost dies, but is saved by vampire venom and becomes a vamp. And, I almost hate to say this, vampire Bella is almost cool. Vampire Bella still is totally over dramatic, but at least now she isn't totally defenseless. She is addicted to sex more than blood, oddly enough. She also has a lot of control over herself and her emotions, something that with vamps comes with age. However, she gave birth to a half vamp-half human baby. The Royal Family shows up to kill them all, but this fails to happen because of Bella's super shield and a lot of talking.

In the end there is no blood shed and no one dies except for Bella. For as long as the book is, nothing really happens that wasn't expected. There is a lot of yapping and almost no action. I only finished the book to be done with it. I was really hoping that vampire Bella wouldn't be as whiny and over dramatic as human Bella, but alas, she is. The only difference is that vamp Bella knows she's beautiful and stunning and vampire Bella is actually good at things, like jumping over rivers and protecting her brain from things. Bella gets everything she wants as well, which is sort of sad. She gets Edward, Jacob becomes part of her family and she did get a baby (a child that grows super fast and is like a little adult by the age of three months and will be full grown in six years). Oh, a happy ending.

Another thing, with reading the books through a second time, I did not see much foreshadowing...not much connecting through out the books like the Harry Potter series had. The only thing that was really explained was why no one could get in Bella's head: she had a shield. I am a huge fan of Harry Potter. I have lost track of the time I've read those books and found something new that connected in a different book. These books, not so much. They are still wroth a read if you have the time and do not tend to think very much about what you are reading. Or you don't mind reading a book with a drama queen for the main character (she is not a negative drama queen, she's just a little over dramatic for her own good, but she is 18 in most of the books.) I enjoyed them even though I disliked the main character. But that is just me.

everybody things i'm weird

Well, this past weekend I came across two articles that caught my attention simply by the headlines: Conrad and I were betrayed and US Judge Amy St. Eve Rezko Judge is a big punch in a small package. Both were found under my Google News section for Mr. Black.

The first one caused me to roll my eyes a few times. During the trial Mrs. Black spent a good deal of the time she was in the courtroom glaring, just as her husband spent his time glowering. Both of which were understandable to me, as neither believed he or she should be on trial an in the courtroom. Now, while this trial has been over for a year and Mr. Black has been moved to a jail in Florida, I cannot figure out why she simply has not accepted the facts and moved on. Something fishy happened. End of story. This fishy thing that occurred was...illegal and now you must pay the price. I do not believe the people in the trial were used as "a lesson" for others out there. I am not sure I know of a person who would plead guilty to something if they were no guilty of something in general. Radler might not be guilty of what he plead to, but it had to be a worst crime he was guilty of if he plead guilty to something he wasn't. The fishy character that Ralder is causes him not to be bullied and not to do what is not best for his own orange hide. This comment by Norman Farrell summed up my feelings on the article:

When people spend a career comforted by sycophants and servants, they lose ability to judge experiences with common standards. Conrad is convinced he did nothing wrong. Barbara is too. The jury disagreed. The Chicago trial judge, one of America's finest, disagreed. The appeal court did too.

Norman Farrell, Vancouver, Canada

The next artcile, well, I've read several like it. Judge St. Eve is really one in a million it seems. Now, I have not worked with many judges in my life, but I have heard horror stories. Judge St. Eve understand how to get a jury to work together and how to make them happy. To be on a jury (especially one that goes on for three long months) is hard. It disrupts your life. It causes you to live a different life and disconnect from the world. You don't go to work except one day a week, you cannot talk about what you have been doing for that time, while everyone alive wants to know and tell you what they know. It does have its perks, as I took it as a learning experience. I followed the Rezko trial throughout all of it, and while many people complained about all the 'breaks' the jury took, I knew why. Life must go on for happy jurors. If you have unhappy jurors you will never get an answer that is impartial and clearly based on the evidence. and unhappy jurors will take a lot longer than ones who are happy working half days trying to sift through mountains of evidence.

Another news article I was pointed at, was this one by Clarence Page, who my dad had worked with at one point: Paris for President. I had not heard much about this, other than a little spot on Talk Soup about Kathy Hilton's response to it. It is an interesting story, how Paris's plan for energy might be the best one out there. Well, who ever wrote the two minute dialouge's plan that is...

Stalking the Morning After

I have been stalking the Morning After Mini bag by Rebecca Minkoff for about nine months now. I used to only stalk the bag online at her site, waiting for her to post new colors of the bag, wistfully thinking one might go one sale. Living in a dirt hole has given me a lot of time on my hands, so I have move past stalking the bag only on the designer's website.

Last week I went onto the Purse Blog Forum looking for information on the Bokier bags at Target and stumbled upon the tag for Rebecca Minkoff bags and found sites selling the bags. These sites have sales. The site I've taken to stalking on a daily basis now is Luna Boston, which has a new bag I've fallen for: The Mini Nikki. I always liked the Nikki bag, a classic hobo type of bag, but between the $600 price tag and the fact it looks HUGE, I wrote it off. But this mini! It seems to be the right size...

Not that I have the funds to be buying any purse over twenty bucks currently. I have been reading The Purse Blog for awhile now. At first I began reading it because I was researching Hermes bags for no reason other than I was bored and I liked to tell my husband I wanted one while he told me he wanted an expensive car. At some point I just took to reading the blog, as it fascinated me to no end. How did this writer do all this research on new purses, work, and still buy tons of handbags over the 1000 dollar mark? I still have no answer to that question and I am still amazed when she lists off the bags she has ordered/bought. I thought I was hot stuff when I bought my first Coach purse and wallet after I got my first 'real person' job. It was only after I had bought these two item did I realize that everyone and their mom has Coach bags and it did not make me special in any sense of the word. I had wanted it as a status mark: I had made it now! I owned a 300 dollar purse!

Whatever. Everyone from high school kids to grandma's own Coach purses. I needed something different. Thus, why I zeroed in on the Morning After Mini. It was only 200 more than I paid for that first stupid Coach purse. And not everyone I knew carried one.

In the dirt hole I've only seen Coach bags, or LV logo bags or knock offs of either two. No one carries a RM bag here.

I have realized I will not be owning one any time soon in the dirt hole. And yet the prospect of owning one fascinates me to no end. These people who spend a small fortune on handbags in a year fascinate me. And thus, I will continue reading about the newest Burberry bag or about how wonderfully soft and buttery leather is on a bag that I have never heard of. I will never join these people in owning pricey purses. I actually have recently realize I hate carrying a purse and wish my wallet had a chain or something so I did not actually need to carry a purse. I judge people by their purses and I always feel I do not have one to match with how I want to be judge, because I am a deep repressed cheap skate...I know people who will find that hard to believe, but alas, I am. I almost had a heart attack when I bought the Coach purse over two years ago or so, and I still sit there thinking, "God, did I spend that much on a purse? I am insane?"

And yet, now I dream of a more expensive one. But I am older and wiser now, thus I might not cave and believe I need it. I am insane. It happens to the best of us.

Let The Vauge Musings Begin!

Hello. First post in this new blog, which is a public forum for musings. Stay if you want, go if you must. Let's get started.

For a few months over a year ago, I sat in a court room almost every single day, listening to the rantings of lawyers. That is all I was allowed to do, as when it was all said and over with, I was long gone. However, a few months ago, I became slightly obsessed with the case, Mr. Conrad Black's case, so I began reading news stories every now and then to keep up on the matter. Mr. Black went to a Florida jail, Mr. Kipnis went on house arrest and started selling signs and the other two obvious went to jail at some point in their lives, I just do not know where. No one cares enough about them to say much. However, that so called star witness...what occurred to him?

Well, Patricia Best finally told me where he was in her post here: O Radler! O Radler! Where for art thou David Radler! The title is what caught my eye when it appeared on my news page.
I had thought that Radler was long gone to Canada by this point in time, as all the lawyers (the defense ones) made it clear that this is where he was going to go once he set foot in the American jail of choice. However, from this article, it seems that he's still wallowing away just as Mr. Black is wallowing away. Only, Radler is wallowing in silence, while Mr. Black is still making noise loud and clear.

Mr. Radler was a rather fascinating character on the stand. He had been built up to rival Mr. Black in stature and pose. He was a let down. When he showed up he was a skittish little ferret type of man who was orange. Seriously, the man was orange and wore purple and hot pink ties. Who was this man who brought down the Black empire!? He was orange! Just like the Ompalumpa's from Mr. Wanka's chocolate factory! He might have even been as tall as one. Least to say, he was a less than steller witness due to his being orange and not seeming to know what he was talking about. He was like a guy I once knew who lied a lot. He lied so much he got to the point he no longer knew what the truth was from the lies he told. It all fell together into a muddled mess. People got stuck in this muddled mess of a lie. This muddled mess Radler created got a lot of people in trouble, but there must have been some substance to him pleading guilty, as he did this and it was not in his favor or in keeping with his save his own skin nature.

The comments at the bottom always fascinate me on articles/blog posts such as the one in Nobody's Business in the Globe and Mail. People who failed to be at the trial always seem to fail to truly understand what happened.No one saw Radler as the people in the court room did. It is neat to see how people react to the whole thing. The whole situation was rather complicated and muddled and for someone who is not in corporate anything or a lawyer, it was almost like the people were speaking Greek. However, somewhere in that corporate nonsense, humans were still humans and something fishy happened. I do not think anyone really heard what that fishy matter truly was, but Fritzgerald got jail time for all except one of the guys he went out to get, so I guess at the end of the day, the fishy thing that happened was punished in a sense.